Today I left for England. My family and I had breakfast at our favourite café in town this morning before setting off on the 3.5 hour journey up to Borispol Airport where I flew out to Munich and now I am here writing as I wait for my next flight to London Heathrow Airport.
This summer flew by. I honestly landed in Ukraine with the feeling that it was going to last forever but it didn't. As sad as I am to leave my family behind, I am even more excited to meet with what's waiting for me this coming year.
I haven't really cried about leaving my family behind although just before I went through customs I couldn't help myself. As I finished in customs and my family waved to me through the glass doors, all the emotion that I had been suppressing these last few weeks started stinging my eyes. A man came up to me just as all this emotion started welling up and asked me if I was carrying more than 10,000 grivnas, special medicine or something that I can't remember. He had to repeat himself twice because I felt so disoriented.
''I have a dental gel for my braces...'' I started but he just smiled and said that it was okay and waved me on my way. Oh yeah, I've got braces now. Horrible things. I got them on Monday and all the psyching-myself-up-for-England went as my teeth started aching and cheeks got sore. It's amazing how emotional braces make you feel when you first get them. All I want to do is curl up in bed with loads of mushy food and watch movies with my family.
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| To eat is pain fo' real. |
But I can't. I have to travel back to England and start my new life properly. The 6 months before summer were only a prelude to what is going to happen this year. This year I start school and well, finish it too. I have a new awesome job that I totally love and feeling of renewed purpose in my head and heart.
This summer has been a summer of deep thinking on my part. I expected it to be a time of being completely surrounded by loads of friends and going to the beach all the time and although that was part of it, I have spent a lot of time in reflection on my faith in God and my walk with Him and my reason for living on this earth.
I have experienced a lot of heartache during these 2 months with the war in Ukraine, the shooting of the Malaysian plane in Donbas and the passing of my best friend's Dad.
Through these things though I have discovered more about God. I have gotten a glimpse of Who He really is through my many, many frustrations with myself, life in general and with other people. People are so difficult. And yet so wonderful at the same time. And God is so good and gracious to us even when we don't deserve it. (This truth is especially ''bright'', as we say in Russian, when He is good to people that we don't think deserve it.)
I should be boarding my plane any minute. My mouth aches, my tummy yearns for a proper meal (all mushed up, of course) and I don't know how to feel about going back to England. Is that my normality? Was this summer in Ukraine my normality? Both feel so normal when I'm there... It's all so confusing.
But I don't want to reflect on my current feelings. I want to reflect on the amazing opportunities that God has put in front of me to prepare me for my future. He has been so good and I feel so unworthy but very thankful.
I am grateful for the reflection God has brought me through during the last couple months. I feel strong in spirit to face this coming year head-on and make the most it as it comes.
(A funny thing today: When I landed in Munich there were more Asians around me than white people. I felt like I had landed in Seoul, which is kinda cool because I'd like to go to Asia (and live there) one day. I'm probably the only freak who would think that an airport filled with Asian people was cool... It made me smile despite my braces which is a big deal so... yeah ^_^)
P.s. Sorry for the weird writing. I was very tired.
At the end of July I went to camp with my youth group Youth ''ONTHEWAY'' for 2 weeks. Week 1 was 16+ and week 2 was 12-15. Now this is camping ''a la actual camping'', not ''a la what we consider camping''. We had no showers, toilets or electricity. We washed in the lake we were camping nearby and used pure man-power to prepare food for everyone. To say the least, we had a blast and came back home tanned and smelly from hours of swimming and running around (although I did minimal running and excused myself from many activities in order to read :P).
One activity that everyone (apart from me) looks forward to at camp is the Quest (or ''kvest'' if pronounced in Russian). This basically consists of 2 teams running non-stop through all of nature's chaos to the finish line by following clues from one point to the next and taking creative photos. In sort, the team that completes the quest the quickest and takes the most creative pictures wins.
Anyway, this year they wanted to do it in the evening. I went along with an positive attitude, “Maybe you'll like it this year, Laura. Maybe you'll be able to do it this year.” Ha. Not only were the clues our youth leader set up at each point unclear but it got dark much quicker than expected. Typical Laura dressed much too warmly for a running game and I quickly became pretty miserable.
Thankfully, there came a point not far into the quest where we had to change course because of starting so late. Our team had left first and the second were right on our heels. We decided to retrace our steps, meet up with the other team and finish the quest all together because otherwise it would take too long (which was pretty pointless considering the actual aim of the quest: to race each other). Realising that the whole thing wouldn't be over any time soon (it was already about 10pm) I decided to head back to camp.
I was the only person who wanted to do so, so I borrowed someone's torch and headed back to the campsite as it was only a 20 minute walk. It was dark but I'm not afraid of the dark so I was fine. An abandoned village surrounds the campsite on one side and this where the quest started off. Walking passed all the those deteriorated houses was a bit creepy so I hurried along as quickly as possible singing ''Cast Your Burdens Unto Jesus'' to block out any scary figments of my imagination (#YouKnowYoureAChristianWhen).
Jst as I arrived at the last houses of the little village just before the campsite, a dog that was loose on the road started barking at me. Initially I thought it was within its owner's gates so carried on walking... until it started running towards me. The bark was more of a yap so I could tell the dog wasn't big but that didn't matter. I don't like dogs, especially guard dogs.
Visions of it jumping up and ripping my face to shreds flashed across my mind as I hurriedly turned my torch off. It got closer and closer and I began to panic more and more. Should I run away? No, it would chase me. Should I face it? No, it would know I was afraid and bite me. I dove into a nearby bush. I sat there while it barked at me through the leaves.
Now I had no phone and it was dark. The others weren't going to return that way and if I got lost they would have no idea where I was. I was afraid the I would stay in that bush all night. What would I eat? Would I be able to sleep? Would they send a search party out for me? I imagined a myriad of helicopters circling the surrounding forests with thermal imaging technology and megaphones shouting my name trying to look for me.
I started praying (I mean, there is nothing else to do in such a situation - I am only a helpless kid) and I remembered a piece of sage advice I had received awhile ago concerning dogs: if you shout at a dog and hold a stick it will not hurt you. I groped around the bush for a stick and found one behind me. It was pretty frail and pathetic but it would do the trick (hopefully). I sat at the entrance of the bush that I had created when I dived into it and an unusual surge of confidence overcame me. I emerged from the bush stick in hand, bellowing at the dog. I must have sounded like a complete madman. Thankfully the dog took off and although still yapping and barking it was a good 50 metres away from me.
What now?
I didn't want to carry on forward and walk past it in case it tried to bite me near its house. It was still barking at me and if there is one sound the turns my blood cold it's the sound of a dog barking. So I ran back the way the others went. I ran and I ran and I prayed that I would catch up with them and not get lost. I don't think I have ever run like that before in my life.
Thankfully several people (and eventually everyone) decided to turn back to return to camp – they would complete the quest in daylight – and I met them on the way. I was out of breathe and my vest, top and hoodie were drenched with sweat. I told them what happened and we walked back all together. By the time we walked past the houses where the dog had chased me it was locked up behind its owners gates.
And that is why I am not overly keen on dogs. Call me dramatic, but this not my first horrid experience with dogs. They just seem to have it out for me, is all.
Have you had any scary/weird experiences with dogs or other animals? Comment below and tell me your stories!
